Bachelorette.com has advanced public perception on the role of a penis-shaped lollipop, dividing them between realism and impressionism. The first school insists on authenticity in penis pops. They want it to look, feel, and in extreme cases taste like the real thing. The other group recognizes how silly it is for a lollipop to be shaped like a penis. They aren’t seeking realism but rather a lollipop that provides easy laughs.
The shape and colors of the rainbow lollipop put it into a fun/designer category. The rainbow is about 4 inches long and flat on the back side. Width of the scrotum is 3 inches. The wooden stick makes the whole pop about 9 inches long. The rainbow color stripes include pink, orange, yellow, green, blue and purple.
A ring around the tip separates the half-inch head from the shaft. Despite its interesting look, the rainbow doesn’t have much flavor, so it’s more decoration that snack. Still, nothing says “hippie chick” like a young woman holding this new age lolly.
The nutritional information on the wrapper claims that this one 85-gram sucker is actually four servings! Each serving contains 17 grams of sugar and has 85 calories. That’s 340 calories for the entire lollipop.
This collection is one of the prettiest and most feminine of the penis lollipops. Six long-stemmed pastel-colored penises comprise the bouquet, and each bud is wrapped in plastic with a leafy design that partially obscures what’s inside. The bouquet makes a great decoration, such as a centerpiece, or the set can be broken up into individual pops.
The candy is 1.5 inches long, and has a curvy penisy shape. There is no flat side. The entire lollipop is 7.5 inches long, including the plastic stick.
The flavors include strawberry, grape, cherry and several others, such as “yellow” and “blue,” which are technically colors, not flavors. They taste sweet and do not leave a bad taste in your mouth.
This lollipop is rounded on all sides, with a distinctive shape. It features a few dents and imperfections that make it look like a real penis. The Jolly Pecker is 2.5 inches long, 1.5 inches wide at the base. With the plastic stick, the lollipop is 5.5 inches long.
The taste is mild and sweet, but there is no real fruit flavor.
This lollipop caused a stir in Dortmund, Germany a few years ago when local politicians complained that its shape exceeded the boundaries of good taste. Since when is a plump penis not in good taste?
The rounded pink, strawberry-flavored Willie is very noticeable, so sliding it in and out of your mouth is bound to affect anyone watching. As a decoration, it’s top-notch, with a nice red ribbon and a gold twist-tie.
The lollipop weighs 35 grams and is 3 inches long, 7 inches with plastic stick. It features a flared penis head and bulbous balls. The quality is very good, with a few air bubbles showing but no dents or bad spots. The candy has a shiny glaze which keeps it from feeling sticky before it gets wet. The taste is sweet and pleasant.